At First Sight

Do you believe in love at first sight?

You've probably been asked this a lot in your life. I find it funny that for a lot of people it's a question of belief. They either believe that love at first sight exists, or they do not. Never mind the fact that you can easily find thousands of people for whom love at first sight actually happened, it's still kind of a religious thing: you either believe in it, or you won't believe it until you see it.

If you asked me, I'd totally say yes. I had a few love at first sights personally. Of course, you'll have to define first what does "at first sight" exactly means. Does it mean the exact moment you put your eyes on her for the first time? Do the first few minutes count? The first hours? The first day? I prefer to take the wider notion of the term and say that, if you fall in love in the first day you meet her, you can say it was at first sight.

So yes, people, love at first sight is real. Even more than that, not only it happens but it's more common than you think. And because of that, love at first sight is actually... a lie.

You see, love at first sight, the true love at first sight, only works as an afterthought. You met her, you like her at first sight, you ask her out, she says yes, you start dating, get married, have children, and when you tell your children the story of "how I met your mother" you say "The first time I saw her, I knew she was the one."

You got lucky.

What happens most of the times is: you meet her, you like her at first sight, you ask her out, she says yes, and on the first date one of you finds something weird or obnoxious in the other, so you never see each other again. Or, you meet her, you like her at first sight, you ask her out, she says no. Or, you meet her, you like her at first sight, her (ugly!) boyfriend shows up. Yes, in all these times it was still at first sight, but it was doomed to fail. It would never grow up to be love.

In fact, I've met so many girls in my life that I liked at first sight that any one of them could be my "the one" (at first sight). Suddenly, love at first sight is not so special anymore. Why would you want to tell people that you fell in love with your wife at first sight, if you did the same with almost every other girl you've met? Which makes you think: what's in the concept of love at first sight that attracts us so much? Why does it sound so magical and religious?

Like I said before, love at first sight is only real love when it's an afterthought. You got lucky, but you didn't get lucky because you fell in love at first sight. You got lucky because your love lasted. And when it does, when you get lucky, you like to go back to that defining moment of your life, to that moment where you met her and, by some random chance, liked her. But you don't want to think it was just random, you want to give meaning to it, so you will think it was destiny that brought you together, or that you have such a supernatural instinct that you instantly knew who your wife was going to be, the moment you saw her.

So yes, kids, love at first sight is real. But it's not magical or religious. It's just... natural selection.